A CrackPot's Objections To The Game Of Monopoly.
Disclaimer: This is an imaginary conversation.
Ensle: I see you guys are playing Monopoly.
Monopoly is a stupid game.
[produces fart]
Those who play it are stupid.
- "Do you know the game?"
Ensle: Yes.
- "What is stupid about it?"
Ensle: It is wrong.
- "What is wrong?"
Ensle: The rules.
- "Do you know the rules?"
Ensle: Yes, I'll tell you about the rules: they are stupid.
- "No, wait, they are not stupid if you really understand them."
Ensle: Sure they are.
- "Wait, I will try to carefully explain the rules.
Let's start with rule 1: throw 2 dice..."
Ensle: Rule 1 is wrong.
[produces fart and looks other way]
- "What can be wrong about throwing 2 dice?"
Ensle: Suppose you throw them away, then you can't play.
So it's a stupid game. And you are
stupid too.
- "But you shouldn't throw the dice away.
You should throw them on the table and look at the numbers."
Ensle: That is ridiculous.
- "What is ridiculous about it?"
Ensle: The dice can fall on the floor and the dog can eat them.
- "Then imagine you don't have a dog."
Ensle: I cannot imagine that, since I do have a dog.
- "Then imagine that your wife has taken the dog out."
Ensle: I cannot imagine that, since my wife has left me.
- "Then imagine the dog to be sleeping."
Ensle: That is stupid. He'll wake up when the dice hit him.
Then he will eat them. I told you it's a stupid game.
- "Imagine the dog is sleeping in another room."
Ensle: The dice can roll all the way to the other room.
- "Imagine the room is upstairs."
Ensle: Hmmm, ah yes, okay, I can imagine that. But keep it short.
- "So, where were we... rule 1 was: throw the dice..."
Ensle: That is ridiculous.
- "Why is that ridiculous?"
Ensle: Suppose you throw the dice and they jump up and hit your eyes,
then you can go blind and you have to stop playing.
You see, I told you Monopoly is a stupid game.
[produces fart and looks other way]
Those who play it, are stupid.
Hit this to mail me.
(-: Dirk Van de moortel ;-)