digging up the meaning of Dutch Culture
or:
something to think about when you have nothing else to do
.
digging up the meaning of Dutch Culture
or:
something to think about when you have nothing else to do
.
|
We Dutch have our extreme-Righteous and Complacency side (our
Dutch uncle)
which we all the time successfully get into the news. But besides that there is the passion of Pioneering,
the Adventure, Inventiveness, Down-to-earth and last but not least our famous as well
as notorious Traders mentality. All this may explain the amazing amount of influence this small "race"
of people have and had on the world. |
Believe it or Not
25-05-04
Some American fairy tales with Dutch characters are not at all known in the Netherlands.
The little boy who puts his finger in the dyke to stop it from leaking is NOT named :
(the story is told in the Hans Brinker book, but no name was given to the boy, see
chap.18)
Hans Brinker.
He is the one who tried to win the magnificent Silver Skates,
but there always will be
someone who thinks otherwise;
Rip van Winkle. He is a fairytale character who slept for many years;
Quip van Winkel. That's me, and I just jest faecetious at my country.
the Dutch red-white-blue flag has only been made official in 1937,
but was already in 1596 hoisted together with the
Prinsevlag, an
orange-white-blue colored flag which was used already in 1572.
The famous orange colored
carrot
is a product of the Dutch mind.
In the beginning of the 17th century the Dutch
cultivated
from the
existing white, yellow, red and purple carrot a brand new orange color.
This because of the upcoming Orangeist movement in the Netherlands.
Growing Up
Understanding our cultural history, it is important to know
who we are and what our influence was and is to the world.
Our cultural heritage starts at the moment that we are born:
there will be no painkillers given to the mother during labour;
Doctors are convinced that maternity has to start with pain.
Caesarean operations are only used in extreme emergency.
How we grow up is to see in our children tv programs like "Theo en Thea".
Mostly the roll of the kids are played by adults trying to act like silly children.
Dutch children are little Gods, even when they obviously behave evil
The most heared answer interviewing Dutch children:
translated:
The Dutch tend to think and say that America has not really a cultural
history. However, we grew and grow up not that much playing
Dutch and European characters, but more those of the
Wild West with the American cowboys and Indians.
Arendsoog (Eagle eye) and Witte Veder (White Fether)
were our heroes, but the writer had never set a foot in America.
Winnetou and Old Shatterhand, by the famous German writer
Karl May.
It is for the Dutch just as shocking to hear that Americans never heard of Winnetou
as it is for Americans that the Dutch hardly heard of Hans Brinker and Rip van Winkel.
Multi Culture
25-05-04
Since some years the term allochtoon is in use in the Netherlands.
In the beginning it was simply meaning, according to the
Van Dale,
van elders afkomstig (coming from somewhere else, geological),
The term autochtoon means, according to the same Dutch bible,
in het lichaam zelf ontstaan (originate inside the body itself);
van de oorspronkelijke bevolking (of the original population);
oorspronkelijke bewoner van een land (original inhabitant of a country);
ter plaatse gevormd waar het wordt aangetroffen (formed where it is found, geological).
The last years there are a number of other (sometimes confusing) acceptations added
for example for reasons of
positive discrimination to help certain underprivileged groups easier to participate in
courses (paid by the employment
exchange) and vacancies. In July 1994 the Law WBEAA (Wet Bevordering Evenredige
Arbeidsdeelname Allochtonen;
law promoting proportional workparticipation allochtones) came into force whereby every
two years would be determent
which groups would be classified as being allochtoon. In 1995: the ones who or (one of)
their parents are born in Dutch
Surinam, Aruba, Dutch Antillen, Turkey, Morocco, Vietnam, previous Yugoslavia, Somalia,
Ethiopia, Iran and Iraq.
On Januar first 1998 the Law SAMEN (Stimulating Workparticipation Minorities) came
in succession to the Law
WBEAA. It became compulsory to give statements of the number of allochtone workers classified
to levels of their
functions. And the definition of the target group enlarged to: people who are born in, or
one of their parents, in
Turkey, Morocco, Dutch Surinam, Dutch Antillen, Aruba, previous Yugoslavia, or in the rest
of the countries
in South- or Middle-America, Africa of Asia, with the exception of Japan and the previous
Dutch-Indies.
Employees from the Molukken also belong to the target group. For the full text go to the
Ministery of
Sociale Zaken en Werkgelegenheid,
the
Wet SAMEN
and the
Integration of Newcomers Act.
The BZK, VWS, OC&W, SZW, VNG and all other organisations combined makes
Inburgernet.
And there is of course the term autonoom, which originally meant: zelfstandig,
onafhankelijk;
niet door uitwendige prikkels veroorzaakt. This meaning has now become a
political trend.
About Islam: The last couple of years there is an increase of young Islamites, who
mainly want
to go to Islamitic schools. Resulting in an explosion of Islamitic schools (high schools and
higher).
Other religions will soon follow. Some people even try to compel some type of small praying
spaces
in the public schools. The right to protected from religion on public schools is hereby
getting
affected.
This in spite of the promising text in our Dutch government's policy towards the
Islam in the Netherlands.
And take a look at the contemplations of someone somewhere in this world regarding
the future with Islam.
Right now in the Netherlands the separation of Church and State is at risk:
discussions are going on whether
allowing Islamitic women to wear visibly a headdress (hidjaab)
when working as public servants of the Judiciary.
Is it not inconsistent with the integrity and independency of the Law when
people are gonna be adjudged by judges
dressed up with a
headscarf, turban, crucifix, mitre, with a white pointed cap, dressed in orange or simply as a nudist?
Is it being protected from religion and other convictions about life of a lesser value than the freedom to in the full extend
practizing,
even in institutions like our Court of Law and Justice and in our governmental subsidized
educational system?
Us / Them
28-01-05
The Dutch are still behaving like colonials
The difference is that we used to export the Dutch language to all kind of foreign countries,
and now we create small communities in our own country, each with its own language and culture.
What did the government do about the integration problem ?
• She created segregated areas and districts of (children from) Turkish and North African (mostly Moroccan)
immigrants, with its information and community centers directed to separate groups for which the Islam is most important.
What has the government never done ?
• Putting Dutch lessons for foreigners on television.
All kind of other language courses lit up the tv screen for the last 25 years.
• Organising affortable professional Dutch language courses, available and mandatory for every foreigner who needs it.
A negative aspect of our welfare state is that the Dutch language is no longer to be learned through a workplace in
the private sector, partially due to governments wishes to keep asylum seekers out of the production process.
Since the early 80ties the non-Dutch-speakers had to turn to the facilities of community centers and other
affortable but not professional (voluntary) language teachers. In the 90ties the number of asylum seekers
in the Netherlands was increasing and slowly the relief and assistance agencies were getting managed
on a professional way - with the underlying (but floating) goal to create jobs in a new welfare sector.
What has the government not (yet) done?
• Abolish separation in schools: amass knowledge about your religion you do in your own free time
• Encourage working with and going about other cultures and opinions starting from a young age.
• Create an identity in which the original as well as the new habitant can identify himself with.
What does the government do?
• Nowadays our immigrants are being crammed by all kind of governmental subsidised
classes in integration. Mould them for being employed in the same expanding circuit
of "governmental subsidised relief". Adopting so one of the Dutch present customs:
At the slightest provocation there is a strong urge to start a "stichting" (foundation).
Besides subsidised menstruation dancing there is now the headscarf folding course.
and to encourage integration . .
• the government wants a ban on separate swimming for boys and girls on primary schools.
And now there are Dutch parents who say that segregation for adolescents is beneficial during
swimming
so that young teenagers learn to deal with their intimate insecurities and uncertanties.
television via Cable or Satellite
We, the autochthones, watch the Dutch-language television stations through the cable, which give
us by day large amounts of tv games to watch and which show us the whole night shaking naked breasts
and pricey phone numbers to call for your satisfaction. And in between a continuous stream of Tell-Sell-products.
They, the allochthones, prefer the television stations through the satellite disc.
Can you really blame them for this?
Make your own Cosby Show
18-11-00
To promote a new videocamera Sony adverticed on end November
1986 in our national newspaper De Telegraaf with the headline:
With the Sony Video8pro and some shoe polish you can
now compete with the most popular television serie
'Met de Sony Video8pro en wat schoensmeer kunt u
nu concurreren met de populairste televisie-serie'.
The television screen shows a blonde family;
their faces smeared with black shoe-polish.
The caption on the television screen reads:
Our own Cosby Show 'onze eigen Cosby-show'.
|
A complaint was filed against this Sony advertisement
with the Dutch Advertising Code Commission.
The Sony Corp disputed the complaint in a
letter saying that the advertisement is
"not in bad taste or poor manners",
and that "the Cosby Show itself discriminates,
since colored people are the ones and only on that show".
The Commission decided the complaint was not grounded.
Dutch R Us
05-11-00
The term Nepotism is specially invented for us
The Dutch translation for service is not dienst, but favor:
iemand een dienst bewijzen = to do someone a favor.
Usual responce to criticism on Dutch society or behaviour:
If you don't like it here, why don't you just emigrate!
Did anyone ever thought about this rather cultural question:
Why is it that our fair-grounds have no "Tunnel of Love"?
Besides courses in menstruation dancing there is now in the
Zaanstreek a course started for friendship for women over 55
with homework to do like "make smalltalk in supermarket or bus".
New Dutch bumper sticker: "If you can read this, I've lost my caravan"
|
Eternal Optimism
23-09-01
We have an eternal optimistic attitude, even with establishing priorities.
Safety and environmental precautions, emergency plans and exits are only
useful in disastrous incidents. Those are accidents and in our opinion we cannot
and will not do much about it to avoid them from happening. Over the years several disasters and
accidents have happened from which the precautions and/or approach were sometimes highly debatable. |
|
• Muiden Gunpowder Factory;
in 1972 and 1983 some explosions with 5 deaths.
• Culemborg Firework Factory ;
exploded in february 1991 with some deaths.
• Enschede Firework Disaster ;
where May 2000 a firework storage in the middle of a resential area exploded. (see also the links on
pagina.nl)
but adults and children are still setting off fireworks around Newyearseve, resulting in - spread out over the country -
some deaths, dozens of serious casualties, countless slightly injured, several burnt out houses and hundreds
of broken windows.
• Volendam Fire ;
where too many and too young visiters in for years too unsafe spaces were having parties.
• Amsterdam Metro qua safety; counts also for the metro in Rotterdam. • Natural Ice Fun; skating and sliding after just a couple nights of frost, killing yearly quite some people. • Our Feeling Of Immunity; while confronted with agression: see the tolerance zone. |
|
Beside the good aid organisations there are also several stichtingen (foundations) who's most important goal is
to create nontransparent salaries and expence accounts for their administrators.
Sadly there is no obligation to publish or let inspect their yearly figures, so there is not much to control.
They rather start a foundation for giving incidental aid in stead of striving for a structual and national solution.
The start of an aid organisation may depend on the type of popular victim profile that the founders want:
Dutch teenagers (Volendam) or cultural minority and low income groups (Enschede). The elderly and less campaigning victims from the infection tragedy on the flowershow Westfriese Flora have to do it without the generous gifts of the Dutch people. This also counts for the many traffic victims, bundled by the Vereniging Verkeersslachtoffers VVS .
Again and again we are shocked when ignorance comes in the open and cannot longer be avoided. Local governments want to be liked and being tough on safety precautions is more than their jobs worth. And when there are casualties we go, after the appropriate periods of mourning, allegation, covering-up and trauma-dealing, back to our eternal optimistic thinking. Sometimes we hold silent marches. Not with restrained anger towards the scene of the calamity, the owners or the indolent administrators, but by resigning ourself to this striking fate. We know that these predictable accidents are the inevitable side effects of our - in our Dutch Culture so strongly present and be worshipped - eternal optimism. |
Dutch Etiquette
Don't say a word, while you bump into people
.
Don't hold the door open for people behind you
.
Be honest, even when it hurts someone's feelings
.
Say OP rather then I am sorry, but we're out of it
.
Light a sigar in a restaurant while others are still eating
.
Ask first permission before asking someone any question
.
Make a fake, noisy laugh, especially late at nite on the streets
.
Lay your money on the counter, not in the hands of salesperson
.
Greet three times cheek to cheek with loud smacking kissing sounds
Dutch Sense 07-02-05
| saying | = literally translated = meaning |
| baarmoeder | = bear mother = womb |
| moederkoek | = mother cookie = placenta |
| schaambeen | = ashame bone = pubis |
| schaamhaar | = ashame hair = pubic hair |
| schaamstreek | = ashame area = pubes |
| schaamlippen | = ashame lips = labia |
| suikerziekte | = sugar disease = diabetes |
| engelse ziekte | = English disease = rachitis |
| doofstomme | = deaf and dumb = a deaf person |
| mongooltje | = mongol = someone with Down syndrom |
| koudvuur | = cold fire = gangrene |
| koud vuur (sterretjes) | = cold fire = sparkler (firework) |
| jodevet | = Jew fat = type of candy |
| jodekoeken | = Jew cookies = type of cookies |
| moorkop | = Moor head = type of chocolat covered whipcream filled pastry |
| negerzoen | = Negro kiss = type of chocolat covered cream filled cookie |
| stront aan de knikker | = shit on the marble = quarrel, problems |
| strontje op het oog (or stijg) | = small piece of shit on your eye = stye |
| iemand een poepje laten ruiken | = let someone smell a little fart = a promise to take revenge |
| met een glaasje teveel achter het stuur | = with a small glass too many behind the wheel = drunk driving |
| something is 'OP' | = 'I am very sorry, but we have run out' |
| someone is 'OP' | = his/her time has come, he/she is dead |
| see also | Dutch slang |
|
We say directly what we think of others without concidering of their feelings That's what we proudly call honesty others might feel it more as senseless |
Dutch Oxymorons
Dutch charm
.
Dutch gourmet
.
Dutch talkradio
.
Dutch hospitality
.
Dutch humbleness
.
Dutch fashion sense
.
Dutch considerate smokers
.
Dutch preventive health-care
.
Dutch smoke free working areas
.
Dutch "Brown" cafe's are cheerful
.
Dutch non-minimum-wage multi-cultural workplace
.
Most Dutch speak English
"but you must be Dutch to understand it"
.
Dutch freedom of speech
"as long as it is politically correct"
.
Dutch intolerance
"we are the world's most tolerant people
but we will not tolerate anybody who thinks otherwise"
.
Dutch eloquence
.
Sweet Dutch Lady
Dutch Byte Size Books
Dutch Statistics
.
Book of Dutch Humor
.
Dutch Guide to Bicycle Safety
.
Dutch Rules on Age Discrimination
.
Dutch People Who Were Not in the Resistance
.
Warm Welcome Guide to Holland
.
Flattering Dutch Haircuts
.
Rules of Dutch Etiquette
Found in the Traditional Dutch Home
cheap toiletpaper, the rougher the better
.
wall to wall bookshelves with unread books
.
an unappetizing old calender hanging in the toilet
.
a way-past dated jar of mayonaise on the kitchen shelf
.
a dusty, stained old oriental rug used as tablecloth
also to be seen in typical Dutch "brown" cafe's
|
Dutch Royalty
20-02-05
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| The RVD (Rijks Voorlichtings Dienst) takes good care of its task: concealing scandals of members of our Royal House: |
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Queen Wilhelmina fled to England
one day before the beginning of WWII without
letting this known to our government,
lead our country with no official government in the hands of Germany. (N. vd Zee "Om erger te voorkomen" 1997, p 141etc) |
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Queen Juliana was in the fifties
under the influence of female
Dutch faith healer
Greet Hofmans. She
also threatened
to step down if the investigations of involvement in the Lockheed affair by her husband prince Bernhard would go on. |
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Prince Bernhard was once accused of
being a member of the German SS before
WWII, but the RVD managed to
stop the investigations. He also received between 1960 and 1962 for a total of one million dollars on bribes in the Lockheed affair, asked in 1974 (unsuccessfully) for more, but he got away with it with the help of an incomplete report from the Dutch investigation team 'Donner'. Project Sub Sea Recovery mentions a possible involvement of the prince in some other cases. This all leads to a prohibition of him wearing a uniform in public, but he does it occasionally anyway. He is the founder of the Prince Bernhard Foundation (for nature conservation), while the Dutch Royal Family is known being fanatic boar hunters
in a nature reserve which is on the property of their
palace Het Loo. Prince Bernhard is a bon vivant, unlike his domesticated wife. In 1952 he has an extramarital relationship resulting in the birth of daughter Alicia and in 1966 he got a nineteen year old girl pregnant of his illegitimate daughter Alexia. In spite of all sorts of health problems the prince reached the age of 93, thanks to scarce good Dutch and also German medical facilities he received for being a member of the royal family. |
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Prince Claus suffered for years from depression. At least, that was
what the RVD tried us to believe. It gave
the Dutch people a very wrong impression of what that mystery desease called depression really is. Finally, recently the RVD officially announced that the prince actually suffered and suffers from Parkinson desease. |
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Queen Beatrix (or Trix) is the current queen and the second most
richest woman in the world. She lives with
her entire family off of a highly royal government benefit (the dull), which is almost 14 million guilders a year. The royal family doesn't have to (and doesn't) pay any taxes on it. The queen feels that all her family matters are private and nothing should be made public. She is international well known for her hats with wide brims. |
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Willem Alexander is the oldest son of queen Beatrix and therefore crown prince,
is neither the smartest nor
the most handsome of the royal family. He and his brothers are been caught several times driving with high speed but those things are well kept out of publicity by his followers, and so are his immature escapades. Even the name of crown prince Willem Alexander's dog is for privacy reasons not known to the Dutch public. |
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Máxima,
Willem Alexander's wife
birds of a feather flock together
Both don't renounce their origins, however from both the ancestors have a dubious past. The house of Orange has been criticized above. For the other family you should look at the regime in Argentinië where daddy Jorge Zorreguieta
played a discussed role.Some of us have, with our typical Dutch hypocrisy, objections against the Argentinian Di-wannabe jetset member. |
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¿All the husbands of our queens got just the title of prince. Does it mean Máxima will not get the
queenstitle afterall? Yes she does. According to the royal family a female is lower in order of rank than a male. So that is no impediment. |
| Catherina Amalia is the first child of Willem Alexander and Máxima and the first on line of succession after her father. |
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Republikeins Genootschap |
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Royal itch
08-02-03
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According to our Constitution all people are equal. However, this doesn't count for Dutch royalty.
This family would have been long thinned out if it was bound to the long
waiting lists |
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According to article 40 section 2 of our
Constitution |
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Queen Beatrix does not think much of her peoples' freedom of expression and she makes sure that every so often some critical banners of protesters are being removed from public places to avoid possible damaging or spoiling some of her political and ceremonial festivities. She just became 65 and, like all the dutch people, she claims her old-age pension (AOW). This comes on top of her yearly tax-free benefit of four million euro's from the State. She sees that this is going to far and gives her pension benefit therefore to a charitable cause. The name remains a secret, but it is certain that the money will not go back to the pension funds. And they are already in need, trying to keep on paying the pensions of the hardworking people. Even the retiring age may have to go up to tackle the future financial deficits. Her words in the Queen's speech of 2002: "In deze moeilijke omstandigheden zullen burgers er in koopkracht op achteruitgaan. De lasten zullen echter zo veel mogelijk evenwichtig worden verdeeld, waarbij de koopkracht van ouderen met alleen AOW bijzondere aandacht krijgt" (troonrede2002), translated in: In these difficult circumstances public purchasing power will decline. "The burden however will be devideded as even as possible, with special attention for the purchasing power of elderly with only a pension." |
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According to
Forbes magazine
the Netherlands has the richest monarchy in the world.
The majority of her 3,2 billion dollar fortune exist of longstanding Shell stock.
A part of their real estate (palaces) is sold to the Dutch State
for an annual (literally and figurative) royal tax-free salary to a number of the Dutch royal members
(in 2000 Beatrix received $3,1 million), while these rich are allowed to use their ex-possessions. The annual
total costs |
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The remarks Willem Alexander sometimes make in public, were recently described by his charmingly acting future spouse Lady-Di-Try Maxima Zorreguieta as being 'toch wel een beetje dom' (a little bit dumb) on television announcing their engaging. Hereby designating her sometimes somewhat silly looking, less clever Orange sprout, as King William Dumbo (Koning Willem de Domme). A logical sequence of the nickname Prince Pilsener (Prins Pils) he earned during his student days. See Forbes magazine. |
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His brother Constantijn was allowed to hold his bachelor party on May 2001 in the Paleis on the Dam, using the just restored Dam Square as a strong secured parkingground. The Parking garage Bijenkorf just around the corner was not stylish enough. |
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Maxima got the Dutch citizenship many months before her wedding with Willem Alexander. Normally someone has to be married for at least three years to get that document. And she doesn't has to follow a socalled inburgeringscursus (course in naturalization). In an exellent role as an engaging Lady Di-try she made, together with her fiancé, a publicity tour through more than half of the Netherlands. In October 2001 she was involved in a car accident whereby she, coming from the exit of palace Huis ten Bosch in The Hague, fail to yield for an other car. The driver of the last one sustained a compound leg fracture. Máxima's fault has been denied by the RVD and the Royal family. In the police report she has a different name and the (un-registered) license plates has been removed immediately after the accident. |
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The 020202 Wedding
11-02-02
|
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Willem Alexander and
Máxima
Zorreguieta. Birds of a Feather.
Neither of the two renounce their families, while both have parents with a questionable history. The Oranje Family has been criticized somewhat here above and the other family has dad Jorge Zorreguieta who played a disputable role in the regime of Argentinia during Videla. Our tall, not that handsome prince of Oranje with the wrong dentist and a not that interesting sounding water management study, made a conquest of a jet set from the, not the highest but high enough Argentinian society. Pleasant and better looking (but not smarter) than his sisters-in-law. |
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On Saturday Februar 2nd 2002, the 020202-wedding
of crown prince Willem-Alexander (Alex) and his fiancée Máxima Zorreguieta took place in the center of Amsterdam. Following an Amsterdam custom the golden coach came under attack again from a small waterpaint bomb. A good hit, could be a tiny bit lower. A courages and harmless deed of a young activist who just expressed his opinion on this "undemocratic royal institute" matter. |
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Dispite the in Forbes magazine mentioned
Oranje fortune
(worlds richest monarchy) it is mainly the city of Amsterdam and her citizens who pay the bill for all the necessary managing, safekeeping and cleaning before, during and after this royal circus. And the capital hás already a severe shortage of manpower and means. Besides the rizing of ordinary crime, there is also the explosive growth in national ceremonies and celebrations meant for the entire nation to join. Which is, according to the commerce and her customers, just the way it should go in the capital center. |
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Long after this national festivity in and around the City Palace
(built in the 17th century for the Amsterdam citizens), it is the city of Amsterdam and her visitors who are troubled with all the extra repairs and unsafeness spread out over the entire city. Our civil servants and the already understaffed Amsterdam police force still need to take their leave of absence, which might makes the capital city this year rather unpleasantly undermanaged. |
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Now that the entire media embraces the royal family like tabloids it is clearly
nothing else than an
Oranje-propaganda.
And in spite that sometimes the media writes that he, for a crown prince, is rather dumd and that she want to charm the subjects with a too strongly trained smile, naming them Willem de Domme (dumb) and Lady Di-try is until now still taboo. Therefore the national Volkskrant-Parool-Trouw daily newspaper trio refused the next small advertisement: "Proficiat, Willem de Domme en Lady Di-try. En dat op ónze kosten." Congratulations . . And that on óur cost. |
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What can the Amsterdammers expect from you both
as compensation for all the inconveniences and city services? What about the hint to rescue the archeological site of a possible Castle Heeren van Aemstel and turn it into a museum? For my part with your names on it. The Amsterdam city government rather spend taxpayers money on national events, on an empty container port and on underground prestiges than to include archaeological excavations in her cultural attractionplan. Because it's not a mass attraction. What about giving the public character of City Palace on the Dam back to the people? Or both? A timeless and long-time gift. Good for the Amsterdam community as well as for the royal image, for the nicknames come with the deeds. |
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Q
pLeaSe Link, don't Steal feel free to comment, but don't shoot the messenger copyright © quip@deds.nl q u i p v a n w i n k e l |
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